REVIVAL 19 NEWS AND NOTES

• • Word is coming in that Ned Reform missed ReVival 19 due to illness. Originally, he had told PRIME officials that it was because of a death in the family, but this was quickly determined to be a lie as Ned has little to no contact with his family due to the fact that they cannot stand him. Instead, it’s believed The Good Doctor fabricated the story because he believes only the weak get too sick to fulfill their commitments. So either he either is, in fact, weak OR an ignorant jackass with an archaic and toxic belief system. You can decided which works better for you.

 

• • Paxton Ray was declined medical treatment at Sunrise Medical Center following his injuries from several steel chair shots at the hands of Jared Sykes. You read that right – he didn’t decline treatment, but Sunrise turned him away due to, as they put it, uncommonly low hospital bed availability. Ray’s team consisting of Foster Nackedy and Chet Fleetwood arrived in Las Vegas the next morning to handle their slightly damaged star.

We asked Fleetwood for a status on Ray’s health and mental state and received the following answer: “He fine. But he mad. He big mad.” We asked if he wanted us to add the word “is” to any of those statements and he screamed at us to go away.

 

• • Following the altercation between Jared Sykes (King Blueberry) and Paxton Ray at ReVival 19, we have been able to confirm that PRIME officials have levied a fine against Sykes for his role in the conflict. He has been ordered to reimburse the MGM Grand for the cost of the chairs that were damaged in the backstage battle, to the tune of $114.50 ($22.81 per chair).

The fight, which took a dark turn before being broken up by the Winds of Change, has divided the wrestling community into whether or not that level of violence was warranted, including a stern rebuke on the company’s internal Jabber platform from Ivan Stanislav about the nature of “vigilante crap.”

Despite the outcry, the Kings camp has been silent on the issue, refusing to answer any questions on the matter.

• • For his role in the attack, Paxton Ray has been fined $20,000 for raising his hand to Justine Calvin, provoking the attack from Sykes. When asked about this in another statement, Chet Fleetwood said: “It dumb. It corrupt.”

 

• • Ivan Stanislav has been fined $202,400 USD for his actions on ReVival 19, which include: assaulting two stagehands, destroying announcer headsets/monitors/the broadcast booth/a camera, and assaulting Hall of Fame announcer Nick Stuart. The fine is to be paid in U.S. dollars by ReVival 20; at the current exchange rate, that equals $12,414,086.67 RUB.

In addition to this, Ivan is required to give a sincere, remorseful apology to local union workers associated with PRIME shows.

 

• • Cameras did not catch who brutally assaulted The Anglo Luchador backstage at ReVival 19. Tony Gamble swears up and down that he had no part in it. While the Intense Champion once again miraculously passed concussion protocols, PRIME security forces aren’t buying his accusations that it was Frank Pastore and Dominic Cruz, members of the Gamble Adoration Society, who laid the savage beating down. Gamble promises he will get to the bottom of who’s responsible for the beatdown on ReVival 20 ahead of the big tag match between he and Mortimer Knightengale and the Luchador and Ivan Stanislav.

 

• • Timo was seen crying in the bathroom after ReVival 19 was over. Head custodian Julian Bathory had this to say, “Lindsay told him before she told Champion Jiles. Poor guy was sobbing.”

 

• • Bobby Dean showed up to catering.

 

• • Hayes Hanlon was described as being more elated than happy upon hearing the news of his idol pulling double duty at Colossus. Hanlon’s heavily favored opponent, Universal Champion, Cancer Jiles, had this to say on the matter: “Of course he would, he is a coward.”

Nova, PRIME veteran and said Hanlon idol, was too busy smoking to comment on his upcoming busy weekend. He allegedly showed signs of fear upon first learning he not only had to wrestle the returning Guppy Gold, but also officiate the biggest main event he’ll ever been apart of.

 

• • Cancer Jiles was questioned about his recent affiliation with the SDDL and had this to say: “With balls these big of course it looks small. It’s not like I’m walking around with a set of blueberries hanging down there.”

 

• • Joe Fontaine has formally announced to PRIME media and to RingDispatch.com that there will be another attempt at a peace summit between himself and El Hijo del Super Cool Guy to take place live at ReVival 20. The previous attempt, which took place on ReVival 8, ended with a powerbomb by Sid Phillips and renewed hostilities.

Smooth Joe Cool and the Masked Mannequin of Macy’s have had a bitter feud dating back to Culture Shock, which often culminated in Fontaine taking inexplicable Canadian Destroyers from the Tijuana mannequin. At one point, Joe suffered an attack so bizarre and inexplicable at ReVival 9 that several viewers, PRIME roster members, PRIME staff members, and an Enemigo have had to go to therapy for it.

But tensions have cooled since UltraViolence, and both sides now believe that a long-lasting peace can at last be formed.

When asked for comment, El Hijo del Super Cool Guy had this to say: “…”

No, we don’t speak Klingon either.

 

• • Lady Troy recently auditioned for a supporting role in The Greatest Showman 2.

 

• • Tempers flared between Brandon Youngblood and Nate Colton after their victory at ReV 19. Mere minutes after they had been teammates against 2Become1, they were at each other’s throats – an outburst sparked by Colton’s decision to return the Five Star Championship belt to the reigning champion, FLAMBERGE. Security managed to control the wrestlers involved long enough to get them backstage, but sources within PRIME report that the argument between the Tower of Babel and the Next Diamond continued behind closed doors.

Our own Angelica Brooks reached out to Colton on the matter: “I mean…look, I owe Brandon a lot already. He’s gone out of his way to look out for me; he even let me stay in his home while we trained together. I appreciate that, I really do. And it’s not like I was excited to give that belt back to FLAMBO. God knows I laughed my share at how mad he got. Hell, if I wasn’t in the title match, I probably would have handed it back to Brandon. But…there’s been a couple things that came up in the last few days. Reminded me of how important it is to do the right thing, even when you don’t want to. I’ll be honest, having to hand that belt to him…it sucked. It sucked so bad. But…it was the right thing.”

When asked how Youngblood felt about the matter, Colton was far more hesitant. “We…haven’t talked since the show. I’m hoping he’ll come around and we can smooth things over before Colossus; there’s enough on the line without adding more bad blood.”

 

• • After Brandon Youngblood secured his tenth victory, and very much to his surprise, a bouquet of red roses was waiting for him in his locker room.

There was an attached note.

While the roses would wind up in the trash, and the note torn up with most of its contents unknown, the sender was able to be pieced together: “Main Event Mainstay and forever PRIME UNIVERSAL CHAMPION, King motherfucking COOL, Cancer Jiles.”

Jiles was asked about the bouquet later that night after leaving his skybox. He responded: “Yeah I did it. I’m happy for him. It’s quite the accomplishment. Ten wins. And to think it wasn’t even in the Main Event? Crazy. Hopefully he doesn’t squander it, and he can ride whatever momentum it might give a person like him for when he’s opening my show next month.”

 

• • Lost in the reports coming out of ReVival 19, but the Kings of Popsicles can now claim their place in PRIME history with the longest single Tag Team Championship reign at 140 days and counting following the conclusion of last Friday’s show. The previous record of 138 days was set by Crudely Civilized (Tony Rolo and Joey Troy) during the spring of 2004 and had endured for 18 years.

 

• • It’s being reported that numerous e-sports teams have contacted Eddie Cross after his big win on ReV 19. Cross has yet to commit to any offer.

“I know what I’m worth,” Cross said when asked about the offers. “A team wants me? They’re going to have to prove it. Somebody wants to be on the ground floor on my way to the top? It better be an offer that blows me away.”

While he wouldn’t get into specifics, Cross assured us he would want compensation close to his PRIME deal.

“That’s time I could be using to train or boost my own streams,” Cross continued. “I’m not against committing to one team. It has to be an offer that makes sense for me. If you’re not bringing your best to my table, don’t waste my time.”

 

• • The challenge is out there! PRIME Hall of Famer Sonny Silver aka Mr. Silver, Chairman of PRIME, aka Mr. Silver, Sports Entertainment Liaison of PRIME, has issued a challenge to fellow Hall of Famer, Nova: a one-on-one match where The Risen Star will have his Hall of Famer status removed if he loses. Silver is a close friend of Nova; the two were stablemates years ago in the group, F-U, when Nova was rising in status. Both men are former Universal Champions as well, and rumors are that PRIME management is being placed in a difficult spot as to allow these specific terms for the match. We are hoping to have answers in the coming weeks, but we are told that Sonny Silver has been cleared for in-ring competition should it be made official.

 

• • Up-and-comer Rocky de Leon begins training in earnest this week. It is unclear whether his involvement in PRIME is a paid writing assignment or whether he’s using investigative journalism as a cover to live out a boyhood fantasy. Some of the premiere U.S. newspapers and magazines have all denied involvement in this strange project. Either way, only time will tell whether Rocky rocks the world or the world rocks his face.

 

• • A recent message in a bottle washed up at the famed Caesers Palace fountain. The note inside detailed a fate worse than death, and foreshadowed the gregarious tortures of misery and agony. It read: Phil Atken is still contemplating a Glasgow smile.

 

• • Melvin Beauregard has been officially cleared by doctors to return to work. Melvin’s previous appearances following the vicious parking garage attack were not endorsed by his medical team. We reached out to Melvin for comment: “Of course I was working while not being medically cleared. That’s what the hardest working people in this industry do. I’m still being advised to wear the neck brace and use my crutches as needed. So they’ll still be with me. But I’m a pretty tough guy. I’m just excited to get backstage and help PRIME take steps forward into the new year.”

 

• • Head of Talent Relations, Matt Ward, is said to be hard at work seeking out new talent to continue to bolster the PRIME roster. The search comes amidst talks of Ward taking a reduced role with the company in 2023 to spend more time with his family.

The goal is to have new additions ready to put pen to paper for the new year and, though focus remains on Colossus, some offers may go out between now and the big show. Ward stated that, while his beard was gray & his knees were shot, his eye for talent remained sharp and that it was his expectation PRIME would remain a premiere destination for superstars in 2023 and beyond.

 

• • As controversy swirls around the Belmont Classic, organizers have been frantically trying to settle things down. A statement from the Foundation says that they expect no further cancellations, thanks to additional efforts to ensure the safety of all participants. The security staff has been doubled, and all participants have received emphatic reminders of what conduct is considered “unbecoming” of the Belmont Classic, and the consequences that can befall anyone who engages in such conduct.

“It’s an issue we take very seriously,” Carter Laughlin said. “One only has to look at the case of [REDACTED] to understand that.”

This was a reference to an incident in the 1997 tournament, when one wrestler attacked another in the locker room ahead of their quarterfinal match. The victim was unable to compete, and had to forfeit his match. The attacker, on the other hand, was disqualified from the event, barred from the arena, and permanently blacklisted from all major wrestling promotions and most of the minor ones. In addition, most video footage of his matches has been erased, and his name has not appeared in print since then. Peter Rahal, columnist and wrestling historian, let us know that he has found no evidence of [REDACTED] wrestling a single match, anywhere, in the last 25 years.

In more uplifting news, the Belmont Classic have also announced a special guest ring announcer for the event: Dustin Callais, a New Orleans native and former student of Gray’s Wrestling Academy, whose dreams were cut short by injury. Dustin is a freshman at Tulane University and previously served as the ring announcer at the Fighting For Dustin event in 2020, which raised money to help with his medical expenses and college tuition.

 

• • El Temblor and Timo Bolamba wish to invite everyone* to Cancun on the weekend of February 18th, 2023 for the nuptials and celebration of El Temblor and his wife to be, Rosalina, aboard a Pirate Ship. Airfare will be provided by request, and all guests will be be afforded an all-inclusive room at the Riu Palace. See Timo Bolamba for details or call 1-800-TRCHERY to secure your spot.

*Of course, by everyone, El Temblor does not mean Paxton Pay for reasons of actual treachery.