Bang! Pro Wrestling at Hamamatsu (1/11)

It’s Hamamatsu, and that’s always a great place to Bang!

Bang! Openweight Champion “Big Iron” Gorou Ichikawa has new, if temporary allies in his ongoing beef with the renewed Crownless Kingdom. The Godslayer continues to tear apart anyone he gets his hands on.

Welcome to Bang! Pro Wrestling, where becoming someone’s father is merely another championship to be won!

JANUARY 11th, 2023: HAMAMATSU

• Junpei Tsukioka def. Sam Smart @ 6:29 by pinfall with the Roppongi Goodnight (fallaway sleeper neckbreaker)
• Infinite Paternity Gauntlet!: Bex Savage def. Victor “the Constrictor” Bolamba @ 12:55 by countout
• The Winds of Change (Coral Avalon, Joe Fontaine & Sid Phillips) and Garry “Ray-Ray” Nelson def. The Jacks of All Trades (“Jumpin’” Jack Sweetwater, “Jammin’” Jack Graves & “Picture Perfect” Jack Pizazz) and “Don of the Deathmatch” Rory Hayes @ 19:08 by pinfall after the Twisted Tower (Powerbomb/Triple jump moonsault) from Phillips/Fontaine on Pizazz
• Akira Hanazawa & The Beasts of Tokyo (Seiko Serizawa & HAMAYUMI) def. The Ironhearts (“Iron Idol” Riko Tsukino, “Hawkeye” Taka Sakaragi & Kensuke BLACK) @ 16:19 by pinfall after the Ragnarok Driver (Argentine backbreaker rack into a piledriver) from Hanazawa on Sakaragi
• The Crownless Kingdom (Claire Merci, Powerslam Anubis, and Ignacio el Jaguar) and “Big Iron” Gorou Ichikawa, Jared Sykes & Justine Calvin go to a double disqualification @ 22:09

NOTABLE EVENTS
The next confirmed participant in the Conception Tournament is the newest member of the Ironhearts and rising star, Taka Sakaragi! Sakaragi, the self-styled Hawkeye, has made his mark in Bang! Pro Wrestling in the past year. However, he has been having difficulties fitting into the Ironhearts. Can Sakaragi make his mark as a singles star and give birth to the first reign of the Bang! Conception Championship?

That came out wrong, but that’s okay because this is Bang! Pro Wrestling! Everything comes out wrong when you’re ready for some Bang!

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Junpei Tsukioka took home a win over Sam Smart in quick succession, putting him down with the Roppongi Goodnight. Tsukioka attempted to exchange words with his new stablemate, Victor Jimenez, on his way to defend the honor of the Bolamba name, but Jimenez brushed him off to focus on his match. Tsukioka mentioned to reporters later that he’s not sure about the new blood in the Kazuyagumi, and hints that there might be more new members on the horizon.

Could one of them be Pom Shinjoku? Well, she didn’t give an answer to Kazuya’s invitation quite yet, as she was not in action in Hamamatsu.

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Timo Bolamba has a new “son”, as Bex Savage used ingenuity and a little irony to tie up the Constrictor on the outside, allowing her to win the match by countout. Prior to this, Jimenez had largely dominated the contest, virtually tying Savage in knots before the match spilled to the floor and Savage could return the favor in tying him up in the camera cables on the floor. When asked for comment, Jimenez yelled at reporters in Spanish and stormed off.

At the rate this is going, Timo might need a stadium to host his next family reunion. Based on reputation, though, he might already own one.

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After a notable lack of success in their tour so far, the Winds of Change scored a big win over the Jacks of All Trades and Rory Hayes, with Fontaine and Phillips debuting a new tandem finisher to put down Jack Pizazz and getting revenge for losing at the Clash of Aces earlier in the month. In a backstage interview, Fontaine named the move the “Twisted Tower”, which I think he said as a joke but I think that’s what we’re calling it now.

The match was a giant brawl highlighted when Jack Pizazz attempted to low blow his way out of trouble against Fontaine, only to discover – to his horror – that his other three opponents were looming behind him ready to smash him. Which they did. Thoroughly. 

The Winds would later confront the Beasts of Tokyo after their victory over the Ironhearts alongside frequent begrudging partner Akira Hanazawa to call their shot against them at Explosion!! In Osaka… which makes the next title defense a triple threat match between the Beasts, the Trash, and the Winds!

Hanazawa then yeeted Joe Fontaine out of his way as he left the ringside area, because everyone in Bang! apparently gets to yeet him at least once. Stated in the contract and everything!

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More chaos ensued in the main event, which is typical of a Bang! show, as the Crownless Kingdom fought the temporary alliance of Gorou Ichikawa, Jared Sykes, and Justine Calvin to a double disqualification. This happened after Powerslam Anubis and Gorou Ichikawa both shoved a referee down while trying to escalate their fight. You know, with steel chairs. In the end, Ichikawa and friends stood tall over the Kingdom, but Claire Merci and her men remained thorns in Ichikawa’s side. 

The Ironhearts vowed so much revenge. An irresponsible amount of revenge. More revenge than can possibly be meted in one simple Bang! tour.

Karen Nakano
RingDispatch.com