Nick Stuart: Wow, what a Tag Team Championship match we just saw, and we still have a Universal Championship match on deck!
Richard Parker: I’m so excited! I don’t know who to root for, my old favorite Youngblood or my new favorite Atken!
Nick Stuart: Well, you’re the only one having trouble picking, it seems, but I’m hearing we are going to hear from someone who inspires no such ambivalence in my broadcast partner, the PRIME Intense Champion…
Richard Parker: Oh no…
The camera cuts backstage to see The Anglo Luchador in his dressing room, in the same get-up as he was when we saw him with Rezin, seated on a bench. The camera is facing him, a little bit askew, but he is looking intently not at the camera but at someone else who seems to be slightly out of the frame.
TAL: You know, I haven’t really talked to anyone about this yet, but I think I can talk to you because you also know what it’s like to embrace lucha libre.
TAL: I get it. The will of the gods is capricious. I mean, at least they’re not asking us to kill wantonly anymore.
There’s a grunt emanating from off-screen.
TAL: Oh, don’t tell me you want it to go back that way. You know, I get why they thought they had to get the Aztecs to sacrifice humans, but times have changed. We know so much about the world and how it works. I understand the nuance though.
Another labored grunt comes from off camera.
TAL: I know. But what does it mean to be a “good” person anyway? That’s what they want me to be. That’s what she wants me to be. And is it enough? I mean, you’ve seen Balaam, the path of destruction he cuts. Yeah, GREAT SCOTT and Nate Colton kept him down for a few seconds. Jacob Mephisto had some gunk. But he got right back up like it didn’t faze him. That’s not natural. That’s a danger, especially with a deranged zealot like Hoyt backing him. Does being a pure of heart tecnico really give you power?
Voice: (still off-camera) No sé. Soy rudo.
TAL: I know, I know. Being all the way in one direction doesn’t give you power. Am I being tested? I have no idea what’s going on. But maybe that’s the kick. I have to figure it out for myself, right?
Nothing from off-camera.
TAL: Right. This is a thing I have to figure out. Thanks, El Temblor. You’ve been a real help.
The camera pans over to Timo Bolamba’s gym worker friend and confidante.
El Temblor: De nada.
Another Mystery Voice From Another Direction Off-Camera: You know, I can help you out with that.
A figure steps in the foreground. The camera can only see their butt, which is both ample and supple at the same time. Verily, this ass is among the finest ever crafted on God’s green earth.
TAL: Who are you, and why are you wearing one of my masks?
Guy in TAL Mask: I can explain everything… away from the cameras.
The Intense Champion signals to the camera, and the production truck cuts back to the broadcast desk.
Richard Parker: See, I told you that luchador was both crazy and up to no good.
Nick Stuart: Now Richard, we don’t know what’s going on with that second person just yet. They just showed up! But one thing is for certain…
Richard Parker: That ass has gotten you about to risk it all too?
Nick Stuart: (stammering) No! It’s certain that we have one more thing going on backstage before we get to our main event! Let’s throw it backstage again!