ADAM ELLIS vs. JONATHAN-CHRISTOPHER HALL
“I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing” by Aerosmith plays over the airwaves as a solo Jonathan-Christopher Hall glumly walks onto the stage. He morosely walks down the ramp, pausing and looking to his right with a forlorn sigh. Jonathan-Christopher shakes upon reaching the edge of the ring. He hangs his head briefly, but soon fires himself up. Hall energetically slides into the ring and yelling out that this is for Vickie!
Nick Stuart: It seems that Jonathan-Christopher Hall has found some needed motivation going into this match! He’ll need it as he’s got a tough test ahead of him in Adam Ellis.
Richard Parker: For sure. But you know what, Nick? Love conquers all and I don’t think this match will be any exception!
Garrett Biggs’ “Mama Didn’t Raise No…” plays over the sound system and on the video screen, a video plays showing a series of wrestling trophies on a dresser next to an old high school football uniform that has ‘Ellis’ on the back.
An acoustic guitar plays and the vocals begin.
“Mama didn’t raise no… quitter- guaranteed to get the job done.”
Adam Ellis and Ginny Van Lear walk out from the back hand in hand and stand on the stage.
“She didn’t raise no SOB who that can’t back himself up – been known to throw a good punch.”
The video screen shows a series of action shots of Ellis from his various matches
“And this ol’ boy gets going when the going gets tough- sundown to sun up.”
Dressed in a t-shirt, jeans, and her feet wrapped in tape the former MMA prodigy nods her head causing her bright red hair to flip, and raises her left hand…
“Need a man with a helping hand – he’s always got one to lend.”
…and then brings it down as the chorus and full instrumentation hits- complete with pyro.
“Oh, I might be a little rough around the edges”
Adam’s wearing a pair of plain blue wrestling shorts. He starts forward down the ramp towards the ring followed by Van Lear.
“From the outside lookin’ in it might seem helpless.”
The couple reaches the ring. Adam holds the rope open so Ginny can slide through.
“I’ve been blessed with a strong backbone – I never coulda made it on my own”
Adam joins her in the ring.
“But if there’s one thing that I know – Momma didn’t raise no…”
Adam climbs up the top turnbuckle and holds up his arms.
DING DING
Adam Ellis rolls his shoulders, staying limber before stepping to the middle of the ring with purpose. It’s clear Adam is ready to meet JCH head on. There’s only one party at that table, though. Jonathan-Christopher Hall, in contrast to his opposition, seems more than happy to bide his time in the corner.
Nick Stuart: Well?! The bell rang! What’s JCH waiting for?!
Richard Parker: What’s your point, Nick? Look, Jonathan-Christopher doesn’t have to be in some kind of rush here! If anything, I bet he’s melancholy that the love of his life isn’t out here!
Nick Stuart: Oh for the love of pete!
Adam gets impatient with Hall’s stalling and stomps towards the corner. JCH is quick to duck between the top and middle ropes for sanctuary, stopping just short of begging off. Jimmy Turnbull slides into Ellis’ path, struggling to hold the frustrated young man back. Such a situation is the opening Hall was waiting for. A well placed thumb to the eye gives him the advantage. Adam staggers away from the corner, compromised.
Nick Stuart: Oh come on! What a dirty trick!
Richard Parker: It’s his own fault! Ellis needs to stop being a hot head and think for a minute.
Nick Stuart: Right. I’m sure you’ll say he should pull the hair or grab some tights on a pinfall too…
Richard Parker: Wouldn’t you?
The Timid Tiger finally moves out of the corner to attack, the crowd letting him know how they feel about his tactics. Some forearm smashes targeted on the upper back drop Adam down to one knee. Hall hooks in a front face lock before whipping Ellis over with a snap suplex. A lackadaisical cover, made complete by failing to hook the leg, follows.
ONE
KICKOUT!
The Forever Man seems a bit surprised; not by the kickout itself, but by the suddenness and ferocity of the action. Hall starts stomping away. One stomp. Two stomps. A third stomp proves to be a mistake. Ellis anticipates it, catching Hall’s foot, the Forever Man completely unprepared for the counter. Adam sweeps his body around, sending JCH crashing to the mat with a drop toe hold to the free leg.
Nick Stuart: Slick move by Adam Ellis there!
Richard Parker: You can’t sleep on this Ellis kid, I’ve said it before. He’s good, real good. You take him lightly, you’ll be picking up the loser’s purse at the end of the night!
Adam is quick to follow up, hooking in his unique version of the STF on the prone Hall. The Vow of Virtue’s arms flail like a couple of loose water hoses as he tries to find some escape. He attempts to drag the two of them towards the ropes with next to no success. After a little more futile struggling, panic begins setting in for JCH. With few other options, Hall manages to bite down on Ellis’ hand to break the hold.
Turnbull admonishes the half-conscious Hall while Ginny throws a small fit at ringside. JCH doesn’t get much of a reprieve. Ellis turns him over, grabbing the prone Timid Tiger with a waistlock. In an impressive show of strength and technique, Adam hoists Hall up and over with a German Suplex! He bridges for the pin!
ONE
TWO
KICKOUT!
Nick Stuart: Close fall for Ellis there! He’s been in control for a good portion of this match, Rich.
Richard Parker: No doubt, but I believe in Jonathan-Christopher Hall. He’s got the power!
Nick Stuart: The power?
Richard Parker: The power of love!
Nick Stuart: Please don’t get us sued.
JCH just managed to roll off his shoulders and onto his stomach. As Adam Ellis recovers to his feet, Hall pours out of the ring to the floor with a splat. Ellis wants to press his opponent, but Jimmy Turnbull orders him back to check on Hall’s condition. Jonathan-Christopher is slow to recover, using the apron to struggle upright. As Turnbull inquires about JCH’s state, the Vow of Virtue waves him off. As he turns to his left, Hall is only feet away from Ginny Van Lear.
JCH initially takes a step back, raising his hands to beg off. Ginny shows little concern or fear from Hall as she demands he get back into the squared circle. He slowly turns that direction… before feigning a backhand towards Ginny! Though she doesn’t back down, Ginny can’t help but flinch at the fakeout. The Forever Man smirks before climbing back into the ring to a chorus of boos from the crowd. His attention momentarily stays on GVL, continuing to jaw back and forth with her. After JCH finally seems satisfied, he turns towards Adam Ellis.The smirk that covered Hall’s face mere seconds ago fades into an expression of concern. Adam seems… fairly perturbed. That is to say, Ellis looks immensely pissed.
YOU FUCKED UP!
YOU FUCKED UP!
YOU FUCKED UP!
Richard Parker: Hey! They can’t chant that!
Nick Stuart: You’re welcome to try and stop them, Richard.
Richard Parker: Uh, yeah, well, you see… I would, but I can’t leave you here alone! You’d be lost without me!
Nick Stuart: Your concern is so touching. Who should really be concerned right now, though, is Jonathan-Christopher Hall. Adam Ellis looks like an enraged bull and I’d wager a guess that Hall isn’t much of a matador!
JCH tries to beg off yet again. The right hand he takes to the mouth tells you all you need to know about how well that works. Down Hall goes before he comically bounces back up. Another fist, down and back up Hall goes. A third with the same result. While JCH is on his feet, anyone could tell he’s clearly rocked.
Ellis charges towards the ropes, rebounding to blast Hall with a Superman Punch! There is no four rebound. The Timid Tiger is in deep trouble. Adam looks out towards the PRIMEates, who start to buzz. That buzzing escalates to raucous approval as Ellis signals that it’s time; He’s ready to lock in the Elevated Boston Crab.
HONK
HONK
HONK
Nick Stuart: Oh no… What is that buffoon doing out here?!
Yes, Darin Zion is coming down to ringside. Annoying, distracting, would-someone-please-shut-him-up Darin Zion is marching down to the ring. Zion climbs onto the apron, vehemently scolding Jimmy Turnbull about Adam’s use of a closed fist. He doesn’t get long to make his grievances heard. Ginny grabs Darin by the ankle and swiftly yanks him off, causing Zion to smack his chin on the way down!
Van Lear begins to put the boots to the Honkmaster, who desperately does his best to cover up. Turnbull leans out between the top and middle ropes, trying his best to verbally break things up. It’s about as effective as you might think, which is to say not at all. For his part, Ellis can’t help put chuckle at the beating Ginny is putting onto Zion. On the opposite side of the ring…
Nick Stuart: Wait, is that Tristian-Crispin Gladhappy?!
Richard Parker: No! Yes? I’m not sure! How can you tell?!
Nick Stuart: Because I have a functioning set of eyes. Was this planned out ahead of time?!
Tristan-Crispin Gladhappy, clad in a completely unconvincing wig and glasses with a fake nose and mustache, hops the barricade. JCH has groggily drug himself over to the ropes, draping his upper body out towards ringside. Gladhappy reaches into his pocket, producing a pair of heart shaped brass knuckles. He dutifully slips the paraphernalia onto his friend’s right hand. Mission complete, TCG ducks down to avoid detection.
Having indulged enough in Ginny stomping the ever living honk out of Darin Zion, Adam Ellis turns his attention back to Jonathan-Christopher Hall. Ellis grabs the battered Hall by the waistband, pulling him to his feet. He lifts JCH up for a big Back Suplex, only for the momentarily alert Hall to smash him between the eyes with the Love Knux! The two combatants crash to the canvas, the Vow of Virtue landing on top. The dazed Hall clumsily pulls the knuckles off and haphazardly tosses them aside, just close enough for Gladhappy to reach up and over to retrieve the illegal object.
Nick Stuart: This is a complete farce! Neither of these two should be anywhere near the ring right now!
Richard Parker: They’re just trying to support their good friend, Jonathan-Christopher Hall! Why do you hate true friendship and love, Nick?
Nick Stuart: I don’t. What I hate is ridiculous nonsense like this! It’s completely unfair and ruins the integrity of a match!
Richard Parker: Oh yeah, integrity. That’ll get you real far in life, lemme tell ya…
Zion manages to scurry away from the absolute shellacking Ginny Van Lear has been laying on him just long enough to weakly motion towards the ring. Jimmy Turnbull peeks back over his shoulder to see the punch-drunk JCH on top of Adam Ellis. The referee flying into position to count the pinfall.
ONE
TWO
THREE!
DING DING DING
Nick Stuart: This has somehow turned into a pretty solid night for the Love Convoy as Tristan-Crispin Gladhappy has picked up a victory as has Jonathan-Christopher Hall.
Richard Parker: It’s a small consolation prize!
Nick Stuart: That it may be. Let’s head backstage where I understand Angelica Brooks is with the new Five-Star Champion, Nate Colton! Take it away, Angelica!