ALL FOR ONE, ONE FOR LOVE!
In the background is Darin Zion, all sweaty from his previous match with a pretty pink© towel across his neck, Tristan-Crispin Gladhappy, who’s in street clothes while continuing to nuzzle himself and Jonathan-Christopher Hall, looking to be stressed out of his bloody mind, with his match against Sage Pontiff coming up next. In front of them, of course, is their “manager” and Jonathan-Christopher’s Amazing Life Partner®, Vickie Hall.
All five-foot-two of her, dressed in the loudest hot pink (aka pretty pink© – HEX CODE: #F87FBB) ensemble, she holds a mic in her hands and stares menacingly into the camera.
Vickie Hall: In just a few short minutes the LOVE CONVOY will prove their dominance once again when my man runs over the reckless Sage Pontiff!
Vickie tilts her head back and laughs although Darin Zion doesn’t seem happy.
Nick Stuart: Dominance? Pretty sure Darin Zion lost earlier tonight.
Richard Parker: You mean pretty pink sure he lost. And are you? Are you really sure?
Nick Stuart: Yes, I am. I saw the match. This delusional, fever dream nonsense with Vickie needs to-
Darin Zion: Stop!
It was almost as if TOUGH LOVE had the exact same idea as the announcer. Vickie’s face freezes immediately. She has a stone cold glare into the camera before she slowly, almost robotically, turns around to face the man who dared to interject his thoughts into her time.
Darin Zion: I lost, Vickie.
Meanwhile Jonathan-Christopher is shaking his head rapidly, practically pleading with Darin to STFU and let Vickie continue to speak on behalf of them.
Vickie Hall: I beg your pardon?
Zion puts his hand in front of the Vow of Virtue, telling his supposed “best friend” to back down. Darin takes a step forward, in front of the other two wrestlers. In all honesty, Tristan-Crispin is barely focusing on any of this. He’s drifted off into his own world.
Darin Zion: I’m out of the tournament, Vickie. You saw what happened to me!
At first, it looks like Zion got through to Vickie. She places her right hand on her chin and starts to tap the side of her face. Contemplating. Running the events over in her head.
Or, perhaps… she’s scheming.
As this transpires, Jonathan-Christopher’s clearly been triggered by the word “tournament”.
…And Vickie’s come to a decision.
Vickie Hall: Be that as it may, Zion, you’re still the Tag Team Champions… no?
Vickie is forcing her words, as if telling Zion by the tone of her voice he better say they are. For a moment there, it looks like Jonathan-Christopher is going to interject. But he doesn’t. He lowers his head and takes a step back. Zion, on the other hand, doesn’t say anything but he’s not submitting to Vickie’s comments, either. TOUGH LOVE bites the bottom of his lip, balls his hands into fists and sours the look across his face.
Vickie Hall: Hmmm, I would assume we all are champions right now.
Vickie turns towards the camera.
Vickie Hall: Champions of PRIME. Soon the entire world will know we are the most feared group in wrestling when MY MAN, Jonathan-Christopher defeats Sage Pontiff AND goes on to win the Culture Shock battle royal!
Large laughter from a little woman.
Vickie Hall: There will be no culture shock when the LOVE CONVOY is already heavily ingrained in this company. For I’m the next Lindsay Troy, you see.
Vickie’s right eye twitches.
Vickie Hall: BETTER than the no good can’t-get-it-done-herself hack of a dweeb who needs to run an organization otherwise stealing this company name for herself and-AAAAAAHHHHHH such fucking narcissism AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH where is my god damn fucking fruitopia AAAHHHH-
Jonathan-Christopher (finally) bursts into the scene! He wraps his arms around Vickie and starts giving her little kisses on the cheek.
Jonathan-Christopher Hall: I love you I love you I love you I love you.
Eventually, Vickie is worked into relaxation. She removes herself from Jonathan-Christopher’s grasp, although it’s clear he wanted to hold her longer. Maybe forever. Regardless, The Woman of Wonder snaps her fingers and automatically Tristan-Crispin Gladhappy is out of his “nuzzle trance”. He marches over and hands Vickie Hall a steering wheel.
Vickie Hall: Tonight is a test run for the LOVE CONVOY but Culture Shock will be the real thing! Nobody has a group as big as us! My man is going to the top! Darin and Tristan-Crispin are going to make sure of it! Right boys!?
Gladhappy nods with enthusiasm. TOUGH LOVE, eventually, gives a slight nod.
Vickie finds the gaze of her ALP.
Vickie Hall: Let’s go to the ring, dear.
She taps the steering wheel and tosses it away.
Vickie Hall: Honk.
Vickie walks off as Jonathan-Christopher quickly looks at his teammates.
Jonathan-Christopher Hall: [Proudly] I’m going to help make her life a fruitopia.
He scurries towards her, reaching out for her hand in the process.
Jonathan-Christopher Hall: I love you.
Nick Stuart: Jonathan-Christopher against Sage Pontiff, next!
Cut to ringside.