
ALWAYS WITH YOUR RULES
We return from commercial to the backstage area.
Standing by with Eddie Cross, who is still feeling the effects of his match earlier in the night, is Angelica Brooks. They stand just in front of what appears to be a break area in the back around the locker rooms. A pair of soda machines backdrops behind the pair. Eddie rolls his shoulder and tries to work a kink out as Angelica looks into the camera professionally and begins the interview.
Angelica Brooks: Eddie Cross, that was quite a match against Mushighara earlier. Do you have anything to say about the contest?
Eddie Cross: Yes I do, I want to say that Mushigihara is a tough as nails competitor and that was a great battle. I know I talked a lot leading up to the match, but the truth is I respect Mushi a lot and definitely his warrior spirit. I knew this would be a hot match so I pushed him and Lindsay Troy a little to get what I wanted all along. As for her edict, it never mattered whether I won or lost, I acknowledge that Mushi is a tough competitor. Respect, bruh.
Angelica Brooks: Do you have any regrets about anything you might have said leading up to the match?
Eddie Cross: I don’t do regrets, Angelica. If people tuned in, I did my job. Besides, I am always looking forward to the next challenge. Speaking of which, we all have a monumental challenge in front of us at Culture Shock don’t we?
Angelica Brooks: Indeed, I’d love to get your thoughts on the…
Eddie Cross: LOOK OUT!
Eddie grabs Angelica by the waist and spins her out of the way as Hayes Hanlon comes flying into the frame, right where she was standing and barrels into a pile of folding chairs that are on a rack, sending them scattering everywhere.
Hayes Hanlon: Sorry, you might want to get out of the way!
Ominously following into the shot as the cameraman backs up and pans out is Ivan Stanislav. He is sweating profusely and sports a small tear in his iconic hammer and sickle shirt. Hayes shakes off the impact and bowls into Ivan, driving him backwards and into the wall on the opposite side of the hallway.
As the two brawl in the hallway, thudding blows and warrior’s screams fill the air. Ivan manages to knock Hanlon to the floor and looks over at the soda machines. A long dormant memory pops into his head and, as they say, what’s old becomes new once again. Ivan trundles over to the soda machine on the right and grabs it from both sides.
Eddie steps forward waving his hands.
Eddie Cross: Ivan, you can’t throw a soda machine at him!
Ivan Stanislav: And why not? It worked against Meanstreak!
Eddie Cross: That was a long time ago and things worked differently then, bruh!
Ivan Stanislav: They make machine different now?
Ivan lifts the machine up and down off the ground with little effort.
Ivan Stanislav: Seems the same to me.
Eddie Cross: That’s not really what I mean, look, can we just agree this is getting out of hand?
Ivan thinks and lets go of the machine. He walks over, picks up Hanlon and looks at Eddie.
Ivan Stanislav: I do not understand Bolamba’s. Always with your rules. Fine, if I cannot throw a soda machine at Hayes Hanlon I will simply throw Hayes Hanlon at the soda machine, hm?
Eddie looks at Angelica for a second opinion and she shrugs. He shrugs too and holds his hands toward the machine.
Eddie Cross: Yeah, that tracks.
Ivan yeets Hayes into one of the two machines, cracking the face plate and sending a shower of sparks blowing into the hallway. Cans fall out of the facing of the machine and break open on the ground, sending the fizzy nectar all over the place.
The larger man picks Hayes up and drags him down the hallways away from Angelica and Eddie, who look utterly confused.
Eddie Cross: Well, that was not how I expected this to go.
Angelica Brooks: Me either. Thank you. That was very nice of you to look out for me like that.
He coughs and shoves a sneer back on his face.
Eddie Cross: Yeah, well, don’t get used to it. That was a one time thing.
Angelica Brooks: Right, where were we then? Your thoughts on the match at Culture Shock?
Eddie Cross: This will be my first big event, but it really doesn’t matter. Multiple people, one on one, it’s all the same to me. I assure you I have a plan and I will be ready for…BEHIND YOU!
Eddie jumps forward and blocks a backpedaling Ivan Stanislav from running through the diminutive Angelica. Eddie bounces off the monolithic Russian and hits the other soda machine, breaking the door off the hinges and sending coins scattering to the ground.
Hayes Hanlon: Come back here you Commie bastard!
Hayes Hanlon charges into the frame wielding a chair and beating on Ivan over and over as they rumble down the hall and out of sight once again. Angelica helps Eddie back to his feet and he shakes his head.
Eddie Cross: Anyone get the plate on that KAMAZ?
Angelica smiles at Eddie and shakes her head.
Angelica Brooks: One time thing, huh?
Eddie stammers.
Eddie Cross: I uh… there was an opening for a shot to Ivan… and company insurance claims… and…
Angelica holds up a hand and winks.
Angelica Brooks: Smart timing Eddie, picking your moment to take a shot to the powerhouse Ivan and disrupt his attack allowing Hayes to get the upper hand, thus softening up a potential massive threat in the match at Culture Shock.
Eddie nods and grimaces as he clutches at his side.
Eddie Cross: Right. The reality is we are going to need every advantage we can get, and anyone in that match should be taking their shot right now. Me? I did my part, now it’s time to go lay down and… uh… strategize while I preserve my energy.
He groans as he chuckles and sends a shooting pain up his side from his ribs. Without a word, he starts to back out of the frame.
Angelica Brooks: Hey Eddie?
Eddie Cross: What’s up?
Angelica Brooks: Thanks again.
Eddie smiles at her, shades of the heroic Samoan Silencer in his facial features, and keeps backing out of the frame as the show continues on to the backstage area where there seems to be an abundance of dipshits.