AN INESCAPABLE ENCOUNTER
It’s been a long, fruitful ReVival so far, with a hard-hitting main event left to go. Of course, some people have to leave early, and that’s why the camera is following Coral Avalon as he walks out to the parking lot. Another day, another ReVival for the Crownless King, even if he isn’t cleared for action. He’s nearly to his car when he sees someone else walking through the lot perpendicular to him.
Someone that he can’t seem to get enough of.
Coral Avalon: I think we can both agree that we really gotta stop meeting like this.
Cancer Jiles: Jesus! That forehead really is everywhere! It’s inescapable!
Coral Avalon: What are you doing out here anyway? Breaking into cars for spare change?
The COOLYMPIAN laughs heartily.
Cancer Jiles: Good one, Corporal, but I’m the highest paid wrestler on the roster. In fact, the only change I need is for someone to spare me from Lunchbox Laser and his all too occasional dirty diaper.
The Maestro waves his hand in front of his nose to clear the air.
Coral Avalon: Alright, if it’s not searching for spare change then what are you doing out here?
Cancer Jiles: I’ll have you know that this is what I do prior to the MAIN EVENT now. I leave early to get high in the parking lot. Lucked out last show and there was a scab selling balloons. Almost Resin’d out.
Coral Avalon: Oh.
Is it wrong Mr. Innocent Avalon thought about Jiles talking in a high pitch and not zonking out on nitrous?
You decide.
Although we’ll bet that you can’t unhear helium Jiles now.
Cancer Jiles: Granted, had I known you were going to be out here I would have waited a little while longer to avoid butting heads but oh well. Here we are. You, here, ruining my high. Me, here, high ruined.
Coral stares at Jiles, wondering what he did in his life to deserve the company of this crumb. His crumbpany, if you will. Perhaps he’s beginning to wonder if he’d been someone terrible in a previous life, and this is karmic retribution.
Coral Avalon: Yes. Indeed. Verily. Here we are. Sorry about the high– I’ll have to remember you leave early ALL THE TIME NOW so I can hope to avoid you all together at the next show. Like the plague. Or cancer.
A mutual nod from the CrownCOOL King.
Cancer Jiles: Not to sound cliche but the feeling is mutual, Coral. I for one can’t sleep after coming into contact with that forehead of yours. I guess you could say that just the thought of it keeps me up at night. That said, I think I can help us both out and put a stop to these random encounters once and for all.
Coral perks up, and extends an inquiring brow. It’s really obvious, because of the forehead.
Cancer Jiles: I’ll go somewhere you’ll never be. No, I’m not talking about Night Two of a PPV, either. Or a large face convention. Or a reef.
Cocainasaurus loudly neighs off in the background as if on command.
Coral Avalon: Hell, then? If so, you can say hi to Satan Jones for me while you’re there.
Cancer Jiles: That’s the type of attitude that will keep you out of the Bandits.
Coral does a double-take when he hears this. He’s so absolutely bewildered that he can’t even hide it.
Coral Avalon: Wait, what!? I don’t want to be in the Bandits!
Cancer Jiles: That’s what they all say. However, what they all don’t seem to recognize is that they don’t have a choice in the matter. Unless of course you’re Mom, but that’s a story for after your initiation. Whoops, I mean for another time.
No one can really tell if Jiles is winking behind the T-shades, especially not Coral Avalon. Regardless, he walks away, leaving Avalon to stand there confused about this “initiation”.
Coral Avalon: You can’t be serious, Jiles!
He doesn’t get another response from Jiles as we cut back to the arena for the main event.