Enter Balaam

The camera cuts to a backstage hallway where John Kennedy Royko Jr. is walking hand in hand with his fiancée, Aurora. He is wearing a black Nike track suit, limping slightly with his foot in a boot, and nodding to passing crew members as they wish him luck. A small pop is heard from inside the arena, probably from the shot on the PRIME*View.

Nick Stuart: One last look at John Kennedy Royko Jr. as he heads to the exit for the very last time.

Richard Parker: I mean, not to be cold, but the guy has had two wrestling matches here in PRIME and was basically an unknown before we put him on TV. Do we really need to watch him limp out of here? This isn’t Dusk, this is Rokyo.

Nick Stuart: I think it’s a touching moment and I’m glad to bare witness.

As the young lovers are walking down the hall, a panicked Joe Burro approaches them with a creepy mask in his hand.

Joe Burro: Mr. Royko!!! Mr. Royko, I caught you just in time!

Aurora looks at Royko who rolls his eyes before letting go of her hand.

JK Royko: Honey, will you go ahead and get the car? I’ll be out in a minute. This guy likes to talk, and the pain meds are wearing off, but I still have just enough of a high for this to be funny.

She gives her husband-to-be a kiss on the cheek before walking off. The strange man in the sweatpants and hoodie waves goodbye to her as they both watch her walk away for a moment too long.

JK Royko: What is it buddy, I’m heading out of here.

Joe Burro: So, so sorry about the knee. Anywho, the bosses of PRIME have administered me the task of getting all the wrestlers-to-be action figures for the Fall release. I need you to put on this mask.

John Kennedy looks at the mask skeptically.

JK Royko: What action figures?

Joe Burro: The dolls, they are making boy dolls, I guess they call action figures. We need you to wear this mask so I can take a picture to send to the man doll factory.

JK Royko: But I don’t wear a mask and I’m retiring. No need, buddy, just tell your bosses I left already.

Joe Burro: No mister, I will get the fire from the lady boss. I have family like you!! You see, PRIME is releasing a tournament edition line-up of man boy doll figures so you MUST be in it.

JK Royko: OK, but why do I have to put on a mask?

The unofficial tailor of PRIME thinks this over for a minute as his lazy eye wanders.

Joe Burro: Oh yes. The mask. You see, the toys are being released around the candy giving time of the culture you call Halloween. Day of the Dead to some. Every wrestler comes with a creepy mask. Brilliant marketing, I think it was the Lindz’s idea. Now try on the mask.

The former wrestler sighs before realizing he could just put on the mask, take the picture, and be done with this conversation.

JK Royko: OK I will put on the mask. Hold my crutch.

The wrestler gives his crutch to the weird man in exchange for the creepy mask. He starts to put it on over his head, pulling until it fits like a glove over his face. He shrugs for a moment waiting for the weird man to take his picture.

JK Royko: It’s hard to breathe in this thing, and it stinks. Can you tak………..

Before he can finish, John Kennedy Royko Jr. lets out the most agonizing sounding screech of pain ever recorded. He falls to his knees and tries desperately to pull the mask off. It won’t budge.

Nick Stuart: What the hell is this?

Richard Parker: It’s that magical mask!!! The one that heals all injuries and give great strength!!!

Nick Stuart: Mask be damned, can we get this man some help?

As the wrestler continues to scream in pain, an older looking man with a big grey beard, cowboy hat, and black duster jacket walks towards the camera with a thick chain resting on his neck. He has a bottle of Jack Daniels in his hand which he takes a swig of and spit sprays the camera, blurring the shot.

Camera man: (off camera) The fuc….

The camera falls to the ground as the cowboy seemingly pushes the camera out of the operators’ hands. Screams of pain can still be heard as all the camera shows is dripping liquid spit and a pair of blurry boots. The cowboy begins to speak, narrating over the screams.

Cowboy: (narrating) Ahhhhh buckaroos. Scamp Williams’ time again. Did you miss me? For now, I am known as the Harbinger of Malice. I bring forth a warning to all PRIME, past and present. The Second Coming is upon us. The day off VENGENCE and JUDGEMENT is here. The hero John Kenndy Royko Jr. is dead, sacrificed for the greater good of thee GOD, and is nothing but a vessel of Balaam. With the mask comes great power, recovery, and the voice of GOD in his head. Yup, our young fella’s knee is now no longer a problem. Hope them voices help. I’m sure we’ll find out in time. Hoss, the match is on. The hell is upon us. We’re all about to get Whiskey Bent and Hell Bound for the final time.

The sound of a chain is heard shackling. The camera man picks the camera back up and wipes it dry. When it focuses, we see the old cowboy holding a thick chain attached to a bull’s nose ring which is affixed to the mask. Royko now stands tall and terrifying as Joe Burro works to remove the walking boot. It falls off. The cowboy tugs the chain, and the monster moves forward with no limp. The two men laugh as the cowboy pulls the monster’ leash back, jerking him away as he swings wildly, trying to run down a crowd of staff members who have gathered and now are scattering. A white owl looks down on the chaos from atop some stage equipment.

Nick Stuart: What the hell did we just see? My God.

Richard Parker: Our GOD! The Holy Book of Imperium speaks of a prophesy of a monster guided by a God! Thee God!! The Return of Hoyt Williams!! Our Personal Jesus!

Nick Stuart: Hoyt left a long time ago and swore never to return. I doubt we’ll see him, but I don’t understand what this is all about. Apparently, we WILL have a match tonight with Royko and Cancer Jiles?

Richard Parker: The harbinger of Malice, did you recognize him? That was Duke Williams! Long time wrestler, Hall of Fame member, hell he beat Tony Rolo for a title, and we got a bracket named after Rolo!! Most of all, he is the earthly father of Hoyt. If that’s not a sign I don’t know what is! This is fantastic!!! I’m doing some jumping jacks for Jesus right now!

Nick Stuart: Hocus pocus. Nonsense and garbage. Let’s get back to some real wrestling, I’m very confused…