STATE OF CONFUSION… STATE OF CONFUSION
The scene cuts backstage to Angelica Brooks, PRIME interview extraordinaire. Looming next to her is wrestler, G.A.S. Member, and Library Card carrier, Mortimer Knightingale.
Angelica Brooks: Mortimer Knightingale—-
Mortimer Knightingale: Yeah, that’s me.
Angelica Brooks: You have been conspicuously missing from PRIME programming for four weeks. Where have you been?
Mortimer Knightingale: I was concussed. Concussed by a mad giant that threw me through a wall.
Angelica Brooks: You are, of course, referring to Ivan Stanislav….
Mortimer Knightingale: Ivan Stanislav? You know what he did? That prick threw me through a wall, concussin’ me. He’s lucky I don’t use his nutsack as a fuckin’ punchin’ bag!
Angelica Brooks: Right, have you been medically cleared to compete?
Mortimer Knightingale: What do you mean?
Angelica Brooks: You mentioned you were suffering from a concussion….
Mortimer Knightingale: Oh! So you know! You wanna know how that happened?
Angelica Brooks: Ivan Stanislav threw you into a wall.
Mortimer Knightingale: Ohhhh…if that prick were standin’ in front of me, I’d beat his ass and use his fuckin’ nutsack as a—-
Angelica Brooks: “Punching bag”?
Mortimer Knightingale: How’d you know I was gonna say that? You usin’ that clairvoyancy on me? Gettin’ in my head? Well, you ain’t gonna find nothin’ there, toots. I’m impotent to your telekinesiocity. Did he put you up to this?
Angelica Brooks: Who? Ivan Stanislav?
Mortimer Knightingale: Ivan Stanislav! That prick threw through a—-
Angelica Brooks: “Wall” which gave you a concussion. We’ve been through this.
Mortimer Knightingale: My grandmother taught me two things, never get married on a Friday and never trust a stragheria. You might think your slick tryin’ to psychically violate me. It’s almost like….
Angelica Brooks: What?
Mortimer Knightingale: …Ivan Stanislav put you to this, didn’t he?
Angelica Brooks: What?! I am a professional!
Mortimer Knightingale: Where’s the other guy?
Angelica Brooks: Who? Simon Tiller?
Mortimer Knightingale: Who the fuck is that? Mills! I want Matt Mills! Get that stunod over here! I’m done with you! And that filthy Russian slob!
Mortimer Knightingale walks off leaving Angelica Brooks in a state of confusion. After two seconds Mortimer walks back into frame and exits in the opposite direction as the scene comes to an end.