THE SHOGUN’S CHILDREN
Nick Stuart: Well, that was surely something between the two competitors in the Five Star Championship match, wasn’t it? But I’ve got word senior reporter Angelica Brooks has caught up with The Anglo Luchador. Let’s throw it backstage.
The camera cuts to backstage in front of the locker rooms, Brooks standing with a sweaty Luchador breathing heavily, not involuntarily but by choice it seems.
Angelica Brooks: That was quite the match you had with Larry Tact out there, but I hear…
TAL: Forget Tact, just forget him. Ria Nightshade, I’m talking to you right now.
Angelica Brooks: That’s what I was going to say. I hear you have picked out a stipulation for if you win the Intense Championship match voting?
TAL: Oh yeah, I do, and actually, I propose this match happens the way I’m proposing regardless of whether or not we get the match or that turds-for-brains GREAT SCOTT gets his shot at the Impulse Championship or whatever. Turns out that just like real politics, this whole campaign was a sham anyway, because now, the time has come to shed blood, Ria. That’s right, you wanted blood? You got it.
Angelica Brooks: So that means you have a stipulation in mind?
TAL: Angie, yes, I do. Long ago, in lands far off to the East, men and women competed with their bodies on the line, spilling blood, sweating buckets, crying their eyes out in defeat and victory. The place was called Bloody Japan Grappling Arts. The main tournament was called Shogun Warfare. BJGA is long dead and gone, and the Shogun is dead and buried. But his children are alive and well.
Angelica Brooks: I don’t understand, what is your angle here?
TAL: Let me cook, Angie, please. I am telling you that his children are alive and well and in PRIME. I am the Son of the Shogun. I bring his weaponry with me, and I will place it around the ring at Great American Nightmare right here in Las Vegas. You, Ria Nightshade, you are his daughter, whether you know it or not. You want to fight me? You want to make me bleed? You want a shot at taking me down? I’m going to give you that shot. I may even give you the first one for free. But you’re going to find out that for all your rage, whether righteous or not, all your desire? The things that you want most desperately in the world may be impossible to attain.
The old luchador grabs the microphone from Brooks who stumbles back in shock.
TAL: The Shogun’s Progeny Match may seem on the outside to be normal. You can win by pinfall, submission, knockout, or referee’s discretion. No disqualifications or countouts. However, everything around the ring will be wrapped in barbed wire. The Shogun loved barbed wire, and his entire tournament was festooned in it. A celebration of lacerated skin and demoralized spirits. That’s what you want, right, Ria? To make me bleed? To crush me? You have your chance. The ropes will be wrapped in barbed wire. The steel chairs. The tables. The kendo sticks. The baseball bats, oh yes, the baseball bats will be wrapped in barbed wire. You wanted this, and I don’t blame you. I would want to strangle me in barbed wire too. But you’re going to find out the hard way. The world doesn’t always reward those who’ve been wronged. I’m going mummify you in barbed wire and make you wish you never tried to pick a fight with me in the first place.
The self-proclaimed Son of the Shogun walked off, throwing the mic to Brooks before disappearing stage right.
Angelica Brooks: Well, that was intense. Anyway, let’s pay some bills and then Jiles, FLAMBO, main event time.