Tristan-Crispin Gladhappy
MY WET DREAM
Starring Tristan-Crispin Gladhappy
Tristan-Crispin is a happy chap all the time. He sees the bright side of everything, 24/7. He is always in a good mood, he’s joyous and keeps an open mind. He will give anything a try! He’s positive, upbeat and never at his worst. His worst is his best. There’s no in-between, only shades of goodness.
Today Tristan-Crispin is exuberantly thrilled. His cousin and his cousin’s best friend have won the PRIME Tag Team Championships at Colossus! YESSSSS!!! This has made Vickie Hall, her cousin’s Amazing Life Partner, so proud.
Shed a tear of glee.
The work is not done, however.
The work is only starting!
Tristan-Crispin begins his Hallmark Journey. It started with a bang and now Gladhappy sees his record at 1-1. Tristan-Crispin knows it’s go time.
And go time means it’s time to get excited!
TCG gives himself a nuzzle before he stretches his arms above his head for the good ol’ morning routine stretch-a-thon. He accidentally whacks his right hand against the wall but Tristan-Crispin won’t let pain rattle him. The solution? You guessed it, a straight-forward nuzzle. Second of the day!
It’s important to be intune with your feelings. It’s even more important to give yourself permission to love… yourself! Tristan-Crispin has seen the animals in PRIME and they certainly are primal. It’s like everyone hates each other but most importantly it’s as if everyone hates themselves, too.
Take Jacob Mephisto for example. Tristan-Crispin is pretty sure this man does not love himself, either. It’s why he tries to collect others to build a “family”. Jacob Mephisto isn’t likely to know what a real, loving family is.
Tristan-Crispin Gladhappy does!
His family displays nothing but love and admiration for one another. Of course, the key focus of these affections are on his cousin and his ALP. Soon, and as early as the next Revival, the focus will be on Tristan-Crispin!
Another nuzzle to himself. Good lord is he feeling kind to his own personal aura today. That’s three nuzzles in the span of one minute. It’s good to be kind to yourself. It’s vital to show it through your behaviours.
Tristan-Crispin rises from his bedsheets. He is feeling fresh after a goodnight’s slumber. This quaint little day he has planned has his jizzies in a thrust. TCG removes the hot pink eye mask from his face. It was a gift he was given by the amazing Vickie Hall. Goodness, does he enjoy her friendship. She is always providing him gracious gifts like the pink nightgown he wears to bed. It’s made for a female and three sizes too small but it’s weaved from silk and feels totally luxurious on his skin, he never wants to take it off!
Tristan-Crispin finally places his feet on the floor. He yawns, stretches once more and goes for a fourth nuzzle. Overdosing on self-love is never a possibility.
He does a tickle dance across the floor. His floorboards are cold you see, but refusing to allow this to cause him any harm, Tristan-Crispin dances across the bedroom as quickly as possible. He hops into the bathroom. Down goes the wardrobe but your eyes stay upright. He shoots into the shower and turns the tap to warm.
He sings.
He sings with all of his might!!!
It’s a free-for-all even though he knows no one can hear.
Did you enjoy the Hallmark’s entrance at Colossus? It was DJ Crispy’s doing, you can thank one of his many alter egos.
Gladhappy loves many things. He loves himself. He loves his family. He loves the random stranger down the street, whom he’s never met before. He most certainly loves wrestling. Plus a funny hidden talent he loves is music.
He cherishes music!
He writes songs. Rewrites. Sings. Dances. It’s always enjoyable to feel his body through the rhythmic beat.
If Tristan-Crispin can create something special by adding his own twist on lyrics or writing a song from scratch, even better.
Put your art out there. Give, give to the world. Ask nothing in return. This is the definition of love!
Tristan-Crispin sings a joyous song. It’s probably Cher, he treasures Cher. One name. One title. It commands respect!
As Tristan-Crispin lathers himself up in the most wonderfulest shower he’s had in some time, he can’t help but think about Jacob Mephisto.
Misguided Jacob Mephisto.
How can Tristan-Crispin show Jacob the way? Ohhhh that’s a silly little twist, isn’t it? Show the cult leader what a real cult looks like. A cult of LOVE and HONESTY. If Jacob could learn to love himself more, maybe he wouldn’t be unstable. He could harness the true talents he has! Let out a roar of passion, Jacob Mephisto. The world gives what you put into it.
Another nuzzle. That’s five and counting. There are no limits!!!! Tristan-Crispin needed to make sure he provided positive reinforcement. Sometimes when Gladhappy thinks about others, he can be lost in the moment. This is startling, to be presented with an alternative narrative. A narrative about a man who doesn’t love others, let alone himself. The self-induced nuzzle helps Tristan-Crispin remind himself that Jacob’s demeanor does not represent his reality.
A sixth nuzzle. Boy is Gladhappy feeling good now! He’s almost done with his shower. The essential oils he uses on his body will just continue the positive momentum he’s feeling.
Towel. Don’t forget to bring a towel to the shower. Like the cold bedroom floor, being wet right after the shower steam dissipates can leave a person in temporary stress. There is no stress with TCG, though. While he did forget his towel, he makes a quick sprint to the towel rack on the other side.
He dries himself quickly. With relentless speed as his body feels room temperature again. Tristan-Crispin is a problem solver. He is a doer. No fretting hard with The Nuzzle Lord!
Speaking of nuzzles, he went for his seventh! A new morning record!!!
With the towel perfectly wrapped around his bottom half, he hears his cell phone buzzing from the night table.
Another jiggly dance across his cold bedroom floor, Tristan-Crispin picks up the phone.
“Hello, wonderful person!” He shouts into the speaker. He didn’t want to waste time so he didn’t see the call display. It could be anyone but also anyone calling Tristan-Crispin is someone he loves no matter what.
The person on the other end speaks but their voice cannot be picked up.
Tristan-Crispin smiles warmly.
“Yes of course, oh goodness glee!” He exclaims. “I will be there with bells on!”
He clicks off the phone. The smile hasn’t left his face. It’s time to get ready and spread love to the rest of the world.
But not before an eighth nuzzle.
It’s going to be a good day!!
***
Tristan-Crispin taps his foot to the beat of a random tune he made up in his head. He waits at the back table of the local Starbucks with his eyes scanning the front entrance. He doesn’t want her to fret. Fretting is not good, it’s not a fun thing to do. Tristan-Crispin wants to make sure she can locate him quickly and not have to panic.
Silly TCG, he didn’t realize she had already entered, ordered a venti blonde skinny vanilla latte and now stands to the right of him.
“Vickie!” He rejoices, standing for a hug and a reciprocal kiss on both cheeks. He walks around to the other side of the table and pulls open the chair for her.
“Tristan-Crispin,” she replies while taking her seat, although her voice is much more focused. There isn’t a lot of joy in it. The Nuzzle Lord works his way back to his own seat as he curls forward, resting both elbows on the table, raising his arms and balling his hands into fists so he can rest his chin on them.
“Now Tristan-Crispin,” Vickie begins, “this is a very important meeting we’re holding. I want you to be serious. I know you’re a happy-go-lucky kind of guy but this is not a happy-go-lucky direction for the Hallmark Journey.”
It isn’t? Okay, Tristan-Crispin isn’t going to argue with Vickie but he was pretty sure everyone would be happy after the King of Pop – 2Become1 became the World Tag Team Champions.
“You’re going to start your own singles journey, Tristan-Crispin,” Vickie reminds him. While some could say Gladhappy has already begun his PRIME career, maybe it didn’t go exactly as expected.
Fresh start! Tristan-Crispin is always game for a fresh start! Sorry, he should be listening to Vickie.
She continues on about Gladhappy’s new journey while she leans over and digs into her suitcase. She pulls out a hot pink folder and tosses it on the table. She doesn’t open it. Instead, she eyes Tristan-Crispin. She wants his undivided attention.
“Do you know what this is?” She asks as he lifts his head from off of his fists and takes a closer look.
It’s not too complex. It’s a folder with papers inside of it but you’d think with the way Tristan-Crispin is acting, he’s trying to detect something more.
“It’s a folder with papers inside,” Vickie grows impatient while a lightbulb goes off in Gladhappy’s head and he smiles.
“Right, it’s a folder with papers inside,” he replies.
“And what kind of papers?” Pretty Pink attempts to lead the Nuzzle Lord on.
He’s not getting it.
She lets out a huff and rolls her eyes.
“It’s a scouting report on your first singles opponent,” she remarks and once again, Tristan-Crispin nods, this time with excitement.
“A scouting report!? Who would need such a thing?” He exclaims. “My first PRIME singles match! Tickle me excited!”
He rubs his head against his shoulder, making sure his nose and mouth connect directly to his skin, while closing his eyes and humming a soothing tune. This is indeed the definition of a nuzzle.
“Tristan-Crispin,” Vickie snaps her fingers DIRECTLY in front of his face. “You need to focus. Stop with the self love.”
Gladhappy listens, as he props his head forward again but he isn’t rattled or scared. He started his day off so well and he plans for it to continue. In order to calm Vickie’s nerves, he reaches out and takes hold of the pink folder. He opens it. The first thing he sees is a small picture stapled to the top of the page. The image is of a dark and menacing man, with a wildly unkempt beard and long wavy black hair.
Vickie follows her gaze to what has caught Tristan-Crispin’s attention. Realizing he’s looking at the mugshot, Hall appears like she is going to puke.
“The tattoo,” she begins in a startled voice. “The M on his forehead. It’s fucking stupid. Not bad-ass at all.”
Tristan-Crispin isn’t one to use swear words. Honestly, he doesn’t think it’s stupid, either. He thinks it’s kind of neat. It’s not something he would do, oh gosh no. Tristan-Crispin doesn’t like marking up his body. Still, he’s not going to think any less of someone who has one, even on the forehead.
“Poor guy,” Gladhappy adds to the conversation. “I can see such sadness in his eyes.”
Tristan-Crispin believes this. When he woke up this morning thinking about Jacob Mephisto, he felt pity for him. TCG wondered if Jacob grew up in a household like himself, if the man from Nazareth would be any different. Tristan-Crispin knows he would. A person’s environment shapes them. Gladhappy has been surrounded by love his entire life. TCG is his own best friend. You have to be your own best friend to bring love into the world. People who hate themselves hate others. They are also manipulative.
“Fucking end him,” Vickie interrupts Tristan-Crispin’s thoughts. “He’s easy. A good, quick start to your singles journey.”
Tristan-Crispin starts scanning the hand written scouting report Vickie’s provided but every time he finishes a sentence he can’t help but look at that face of Mephisto. Sadness. Loneliness. Misery.
“I can help this man find love within himself,” Tristan-Crispin explains, beginning to feel a warmth and fuzziness inside. Gladhappy’s getting excited just thinking about it. “If I beat him, maybe he will listen to what I have to say. I could guide him and show him a more emotionally stable way to live!”
“Read the scouting report and kick his ass,” Vickie intervenes. “I have to get going.”
“It was great to see you again, Vickie,” Gladhappy adds, although he hasn’t looked up from the scouting report, because he can’t stop gazing into Jacob Mephisto’s eyes.
“Tristan-Crispin,” she snaps, trying to command his attention back towards her so Gladhappy raises his head. “Don’t disappoint me. I’m not in the mood, okay? We are on a roll right now. It has to continue.”
A warmth crosses Tristan-Crispin’s face as he doesn’t have to say anything else. Vickie takes the rest of her belongings and walks out of Starbucks.
“Oh my new friend, Jacob,” Gladhappy says softly, brushing his right hand over the mugshot. “I’m going to make you find love within yourself. I’m going to express how I love me through wrestling and I hope it rubs off on you.”
Tristan-Crispin’s tickled with glee. It always makes him feel good to make others feel good.
If only Jacob could see what he sees.
Revival, the opportunity awaits.
***
Tristan-Crispin Gladhappy loves helping people!
By defeating Jacob Mephisto, Tristan-Crispin will help him! Jacob will begin to love himself, he will find a new path!
This tickles TCG so he does the tickle dance the second he leaves Starbucks! There’s no cold floor, either. It’s only excitement! There are also pedestrians passing by wondering what the hell is going on but forget those people, they do not need help like Jacob does. Gladhappy dreams about spreading love to others and he has a golden opportunity!
Holding the scouting report in his hands, The Nuzzle Lord prances down the sidewalk, looking for where he parked. His mind races with delight, maybe Jacob Mephisto will join the LOVE CONVOY. Gladhappy could give him a steering well or better yet a space in the hot tub. Amazing!
Dreams do come true and Tristan-Crispin has realized his true calling, he didn’t need to have a PRIME match yet to do it.
Jacob Mephisto will see the loving light!
Nuzzle nuzzle nuzzle!
***
Two Libras intertwined, staring at each other, it’s so divine.
Damn.
Like, damn.
This is what I’ve been waiting for my entire life, JM. Finally a pairing that provides me both peace and harmony. Fun fact, did you know a Libra-Libra pairing is a well-balanced relationship!?
WE CAN CHERISH HARMONY TOGETHER, JACOB! ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS BE MY DANCE PARTNER.
Sorry.
Got excited there once again. Silly me. Have you noticed the theme of excitement here? IT’S BECAUSE IT’S MY WET DREAM, NOT YOURS!
Wow, this is a tantalizing matchup made in the most amazing parts of heaven. I won’t relent, either. Jacob, I’m going to teach you how to love in and out of the ring. I have all the tools to do it, too.
Libra is a sign synonymous with PARTNERSHIP, after all. When two Libras link up, blissful magic happens. We’re about to make a sinful painting of partnership, Jacob and the wrestling mat will be our paint soaked canvas. Let’s tell a story. Let’s nuzzle it out in the ring.
Now I know you’re just a few years older than I but that doesn’t mean we can’t create a masterpiece. We have consent, after all. I consent to you to nuzzle me as I know you’ll be warm to receiving it back.
I’ll be honest, I’m not really struggling with anything here! Like, for the first time in my life, I am working on a FRESH START with you and I couldn’t be happier. I have the healthy love and support from my adoring extended family and that’s all the strength I need to power me through.
I will be fearless in the ring for you because you are a fellow Libra. I can’t wait to explore the option of getting matching Libra tattoos with you after we settle our in-ring differences. Don’t underplay it, this is a big step for me. It’s a monumental moment for us. Let’s now show each other love though. Let’s celebrate it with a sea of people. They will appreciate it just as much.
Two Libras create what I like to call a “natural attraction” so it comes as no surprise that we’re facing off against each other. Regardless of the outcome, I know I will have a joyful time and every cold, lonely night going forward, I know I’ll always be able to mentally revisit our close encounter for comfort. I hope you do the same. I hope, after our match, just a tiny piece of your lovely brain will be dedicated to me, Tristan-Crispin Gladhappy.
We owe it to ourselves to share that special bond. No one else I’ve encountered can lay claim to that. Bonded. That’s what I am with you. I already feel it and you need to embrace it. Close your eyes. Lay down your head on your softest pillow and drift off to dreamland.
Meet me there.
Sync up with me.
The nuzzling will be endless.
Just promise me one thing. We won’t dare fall into the dreaded Libra pitfall of avoiding confrontation. I mean, we won’t ever need to end our relationship anyways so what the heck am I talking about. No planning for that is necessary. I just see us, shades on, drinks in hand, enjoying each other’s spirit from the edge of the world’s most lovely infinity pool.
Rejoice. Another one joins the CONVOY.
And dream on, Jacob, because anything is possible when you have love.
Anything.