The Anglo Luchador
The following is a transcript of the most recent episode of The Undergroundcast, hosted by Angelica Brooks. Her guest is none other than the PRIME Intense Champion, The Anglo Luchador.
Angelica Brooks: Welcome back to the Undergroundcast, where I am now joined by my guest, the PRIME Intense Champion, The Anglo Luchador, or, as I know him off-camera, Tom.
TAL: Ange, it’s a pleasure to be here finally. I’ve always wanted to do a podcast, but no one really wanted a piece of me until I came back. No nostalgia trips, you’d think wrestling podcasters would be all over that.
Brooks: Well, I can’t speak for any other podcasters, but I’ve been wanting to make this happen for a while.
TAL: Yeah, and I have to be forthcoming and apologize for the cold shoulder I gave you on-camera a few months back. You know, I was still trying to find some footing.
Brooks: You’d be shocked at how many wrestlers just think it’s funny laughs. You’re good. You’re good.
TAL: Well, regardless, it’s good to be here. I really enjoy the listen, and I especially love the eps you do with fellow PRIME wrestlers.
Brooks: Thank you! And speaking of being a PRIME wrestler, you are nearly at the end of your third month as Intense Champion. How has the journey been defending that title under extreme circumstances?
TAL: Well, I wish I could say the wear and tear wasn’t as bad as the prestige demanded it, but even though I’ve only defended it twice so far, man, both those matches were wars, huh? I knew the Balaam match was going to jeopardize my career because that man when he’s wearing that mask has, like, muscle car strength. I’ve felt suplexes from Brandon Youngblood, and they hurt, but Balaam just hits different, literally.
Brooks: What about Larry Tact?
TAL: Let’s get this disclaimer out of the way first. I didn’t think that match was going to be easy. Tact has been one of the best in the biz for two decades, almost. That said, I didn’t know he had that kind of brutality in him. Maybe it’s because I thought being in a suit all these years tamed him. chuckles But that was a war, almost on the level of what I went through with John Boy. I could use a nice vacation now but, you know, High Octane Wrestling, yeah, I got myself into a kerfuffle there.
Brooks: I do want to talk about that match with Jace Parker Davidson, but circling back to the Intense Championship, do you know who held that title when the original run of PRIME closed?
TAL: No, why don’t you lay it on me.
Brooks: I’m shocked. Generally, you’re on top of all the history and goings on, especially given who the holder was.
TAL: It wasn’t Lindz, was it? chuckle
Brooks: No, it was Seymour Almasy.
TAL: dead silence
Brooks: Yup. Although you were close, he defeated Troy for that title.
TAL: Oh man, I didn’t know. Dammit. sniffle
Brooks: Are you okay? chuckle I always get the criers on this show.
TAL: Oh, oh no, I’m not gonna do full waterworks, just. Wow, he’s the reason, you know, Seymour, Jason, we all convened here. God. I know I don’t, y’know, like have as much authority to dedicate my victories to him as Coral and Jared, you know, the ones who knew him, wore berry masks with him, traveled the roads in the same cars. Like, it chokes me up seeing them get emotional because I’m an emotional guy myself. But had I known… goddamn. I have incredibly giant shoes to fill. I never, um, was in the same fed as him at the same time. Happenstance, you know, I wasn’t the fed-hopper. And he was in NFW West when I helped out Rich… uh, I mean Maggot, in NFW East that one time. Our paths never crossed, but I knew him well enough to have his cell. Wrestling conventions, industry sh… stuff. We allowed to curse on this?
Brooks: Yeah, no FCC fines here. chuckles
TAL: Okay, okay, but yeah, Jason and I were acquaintances. I can’t really say that I’m going to go out and prove the honor of the title for him because that would be hollow, right? But you’d have to be real ignorant not to understand things like gravity. I just hope on whatever plane he’s existing upon right now, he’s proud not only of me with this title, because let’s face it, I don’t mean shit in the grand scheme of things, but of the whole collective, of what we as a whole have done with this place since kicking it back off in January.
Brooks: Maybe not all of it.
TAL: I think I know where you’re headed, and I’m not sure I like it.
Brooks: We have to talk about it though. I mean, Ultraviolence. Another one of Jared Sykes’ close friends, Jon Rhine, he’s not going to wrestle again. He may not even walk again.
TAL: I’ve already had to talk to a therapist twice this week, once while he was at the chapel for that thing Melvin threw together on the phone, and then I went to see him in person before I got out here to Chicago. Like, I know we stretch the limits of what is acceptable to inflict on ourselves and others here, and I’ve had heated discussions with my uce, Timo, about why what Bathory and Jiles went through in the main event was excessive but better than what that scumbag fuckface Paxton Ray did to Jon. Like, how do you do that?
Brooks: I mean, do you think Timo might have a point though? He really didn’t condone Paxton’s attack.
TAL: I know, but here’s the thing, when Bathory did what he did to Jiles in that match, you know, Cancer saw it coming, and he weathered the storm enough that he could get up, walk, throw a superkick, and walk out, or more accurately, get carted out of the arena with the title. Like I get it, it was gory and hard to watch, but Cancer Jiles is okay. Jonathan Rhine is going to struggle to be able to walk again if he even can. And it all happened with a betrayal of trust and a sucker punch. Seven Lafayette Lullabies and a brainbuster. I wouldn’t even think about giving Hoyt seven Karelin Drivers and an Ocean Cyclone, and that guy gave me a goddamn stigmata. And I know, I know people are chattering, well, “Jon Rhine hasn’t been on the up and up his entire life,” and I get it. Cis, white man, has a duplicitous past, has done some things that he’ll even tell you he’s not proud of. Let’s pretend for a second that he actually might be guilty of some of these things people are baselessly throwing around on the Internet…
Brooks: What are people saying? Like, I don’t use Twitter except to promote this podcast…
TAL: I don’t want to dignify that chatter as unconfirmed and nebulous as it is on a public forum. But let’s pretend Rhine hasn’t made a good faith effort at changing and has done something bad. Right? What’s the net out of all of this before Paxton put his slimy mitts all over him? His daughter and ex-wife don’t have to worry about bills for that little girl’s cancer, and any duplicity wasn’t worth a sneak attack and a sentence to a wheelchair. Like, if something wasn’t on the up and up, wouldn’t you want to expose the guy? Get the court of public opinion against him? That’s what I can’t wrap my head around. It was vindictive and stupid, and now this guy is just gonna end up with a target on his back that I wouldn’t mind getting a crack at hitting.
Brooks: Well, you’d have to get in line to do that. Like, the buzz backstage is everyone wants a piece of Paxton Ray. Youngblood. Hanlon. Calvin. And especially Jared Sykes.
TAL: Yeah, that last name. That one’s the reason why I hope there’s nothing left of Paxton by the time it’s my turn because if there’s anyone in this company who deserves to kill a man in the ring, it’s Jared. And I gotta thank him, and Rezin, and of course Ria. They came out to the Best Arena and had my back. Even though the EPU took them back and made them watch from a monitor, I am so grateful that I had backup there.
Brooks: Let’s move onto that subject. You appeared at HOW CHAOS to take on a double Champion in their home arena.
TAL: Yeah, out of necessity. Well, it didn’t necessarily have to be at the Best Arena, but if that slimy little fuck was going to keep lobbing shots at me over his Red Wall and force my hand, I wasn’t going to do it anywhere but in their snakepit.
Brooks: So, for those who don’t like Twitter, tell us how this all started?
TAL: Well, there’s this indie wrestler I’ve become a fan of, Garry Ray-Ray Nelson. It’s uncanny how much he looks like a young Larry Bird, and I was a fan of his before he became a wrestler too. You watch slap-fighting videos on YouTube or TikTok?
Brooks: No, I stick to cooking videos mostly. Uncle Roger!
TAL: Fuyioh!! But anyway, usually they’re Russian slap-fighting videos, but this Ray-Ray guy, he’s from Kentucky. Parlayed that into some indie gigs, but I’m getting off-task. Anyway, he tagged me on Twitter to this guy this Bart Harley Jarvis, I’m sorry, Jace, and then this guy unprovoked just starts going off on me. He ripped on my mask and then he just started talking about “McKenna Blue” like it was something I should know or claiming this John Sektor guy was the first person to call himself a gold standard, and it was like, Jesus fuck. I should’ve just blocked him or ignored him, but you know me.
Brooks: Oops! All Enemies! You can find it in the cereal and villainy aisle next to Instant Ninjas.
TAL: chuckling Anyway, I had to swat back, and it just got so heated, but he has this thing against us here in PRIME. Turns out though that it’s some longstanding grudge against Lindsay Troy. I don’t know the specifics. I’m not sure I want to know. But at this point, there was no turning back.
Brooks: So let’s talk about the match.
TAL: Oh god, what a war. I knew it was going to be. He’s a smacked ass, but there’s a reason why he is where he is in HOW. Tough son of a gun. I still can hear the tinnitus from my head bouncing off the steel steps. I probably should’ve rented a van and driven back with Sykes and Ria and maybe Rezin if he wasn’t holding instead of flying. But… clears throat I went into enemy territory and got that dub.
Brooks: And good work on that. PRIME had a big presence in PTC way back when. This kicks us off for the PWA in the best way possible. You advertised that you were the face of PRIME for this interfed venture. What’s your next challenge?
TAL: Well, laughs I gotta keep my appearances special. Besides, I have the Intense Championship, and PRIME internally will always be my top focus. Still, there are some wrestlers in other feds I’d love to go toe to toe with in the interfed ring. I mean, the only reason you shouldn’t be lining up to face Stronk Godson is if you’re scared, and if you’re scared? Get out of wrestling. Judy Punchinello is another one everyone should be intrigued by, only in SHOOT Project. Buck Dresden, Chris America, the Champions obviously. Lots of great young talent in sVo and MVW too. But for now, I think I have some business at home to take care of.
Brooks: Let’s circle back to PRIME then, you have been in some memorable wars here so far, starting with your brutal quarterfinal loss to Youngblood in the Almasy. However, you’ve certainly cultivated a strong niche here and are ranked number three as the Intense Champion. People will be gunning for you. Let’s go off on some potential challenges who might have some link to you, starting with Phil Atken.
TAL: Ah, shame what happened to him. It doesn’t get the play with what happened to Jon because people see him as having had it coming, but again, no one has it coming like that. Did he make a mistake putting even the most infinitesimal trust in Bathory? Yeah, but Champions shouldn’t lose their titles because they made a tactical error outside the ring. That being said, when he’s back healthy and has collected his pound of flesh from both Bathory and Jiles, I will welcome another shot at him. He’s one of the best, if not the best here. If I don’t want to go up against him, then what kind of tecnico am I?
Brooks: Paxton Ray.
TAL: Already went over him, but I think I’ll add that I had an encounter with him at the Fighting For Nora Easter fundraiser. I thought he was just rough around the edges. Had I known he was a sociopath then, I would’ve risked embarrassment and fines to get him to punch me and teach him a lesson then. Maybe Jon would still be able to walk.
Brooks: Ned Reform.
TAL: The biggest mistake would be to assume he’s all talk. Yeah, he’s a cheat and a sneak, but that’s how he beat Anna Daniels. That’s how he’ll attack GREAT SCOTT this coming Friday. He’s dangerous, Ang. And he’ll get under your skin too to get you swing wide so he has a clear shot to stick the knife in on a tender, critical area.
TAL: Rude kid, but what 22-year-old isn’t? I think he’s just gotten a real murderer’s row of shitty male influences in his life, and his rage toward Paxton shows he’s got a good heart under there. But for now, I’ll let Nate Colton handle him.
Brooks: And last but certainly not least, Tony Gamble.
TAL: Ah, Wingtips. He’s really getting momentum here, huh? He’s a Hall of Fame dude, didn’t expect him to be on the schneid for that long. But he’s got payback coming to him. I have done my best to prove to the world that this title I have is legitimate even if he figured too much in the decision of awarding it. And now he’s going on Jabber making these cracks at Jon when he’s at his weakest? He’s really asking to be humbled. I’m pretty sharp of tongue myself, but I can’t compete with him on social media. Good thing for me is this is PRIME Wrestling, not PRIME Express Yourself In 280 Characters or Fewer. I’ll show him, be it at ReVival, or at Colossus, or anywhere he wants to throw down.
Brooks: Okay, one last question before I let you get outta here. You can go back through the annals of PRIME history and pluck one of the wrestlers who isn’t currently active to drop them here. Who is it?
TAL: Ah geez chuckles, that’s a toughie, isn’t it. Well, I’ve thought about it, and every time I do, I agonize over it but come to the same answer. It’s Tchu. That man was a menace and a problem in his day. We’ve seen how well old farts like me and Youngblood and Nova and even Ivan Stanislav and Phil Atken have taken to the ring. He’s not too old. There’s no such thing as too old unless you’re dead. So if you’re out there in the PRIME offices listening to the podcasts, know you got one fan wanting you to come back. Hell, maybe I’ll be the one-man welcome wagon in the ring to greet him.
Brooks: Now that’s a dream match I’d pay to see. Well Tom, thanks for coming on the podcast.
TAL: The pleasure’s been all mine, Ang. Thanks!